Today’s woman is multihyphenate- juggling roles and responsibilities of careers, intimate relationships, motherhood, and friendships. It is more the norm to know a woman or to be a woman donning multiple titles and shuffling many hats. Irene Ali is that woman, but her evolution into the woman she is and the space she occupies is a masterclass in self-intimacy and self-love that we all should take.
As a creative, she delights in designing spaces that activate radical self-love, passionate living, self-acceptance, mental health awareness, sensuality, and healthy relationships. That delight is evidenced through the beauty and sensuality of wedding day photos- seeing that warm and loving first look from her clients. Her boudoir photography expresses it as she empowers women to find comfort through sensual expression. Her personality is joyous, her laugh infectious, and her smile lights up any room she walks into. She has a graceful and calm confidence that is warm and inviting, putting her clients at ease whenever she’s in a session.
Whether or not you know her name, you’ve seen the work wedding + boudoir photographer and artist Irene Ali has shared. You’ve seen her in the community, heard her voice grace the stage, and know someone who definitely knows her. But that’s only half the story; what you do not know is the journey she’s been on discovering herself through self-intimacy and self-love and how that journey shapes her. Like many women, Irene put herself into overdrive, focusing on work and motherhood, and reached a point where her health was in crisis. Her body stopped her in her tracks and forced her to embrace the beauty and power of boundaries.
Once I began learning who I was, I started embracing who I was. The broken, the angry, the wanting to be loved, the passionate, the powerful, and the darkest sides of me were all versions I needed to learn to love and appreciate when others didn’t.
The practice of self-intimacy is not sexual but sensual and internal; it requires sitting with yourself in all your glory and your mess and understanding who you are in the midst of it.
It also requires you to get personal with any past hurt and trauma, find healthy and safe methods to face them, and peacefully heal. Irene’s journey forced her to confront and unpack the self-doubt she harbored due to physical and emotional abuse, and she also had to do profound work to understand her mental health and self-harm tendencies. The result of self-intimacy is understanding who you are, even in the worst moments. For her, acknowledging suicidal or self-harm thoughts meant knowing they were triggers and something needed to change. It meant examining the events and people in her life that got her to that point and choose to remove them or create boundaries to better herself.
It’s not the easiest journey to begin, but Irene has found it empowering, even in the moments she does not feel lovable. It is normal to have those moments, but it’s equally important to learn how to face them, and her lesson for when she finds herself there is to learn to identify and love that version of herself. This practice requires giving yourself the grace and flexibility to be soft and kinder to yourself.
In the beginning, I had to gently talk to myself and permit myself to make time for myself for me outside of Motherhood and the day-to-day. In that time alone, I gained perspective and strength from moments of solace.
Irene fully takes advantage of the quiet moments. Allowing herself time for self-reflection, exercising, and self-care routines, she gets better at building a loving and giving space for the most authentic version of herself. We witness that version in her photography, her performances, or devoting time to her amazing daughter. She credits her self-intimacy and self-love journey with allowing her to be balanced and peaceful, giving her the love and care she needs and can give her daughter. She also believes that self-intimacy and self-love are crucial to building community. Everyone needs a space where they are seen, embraced, and loved as their authentic selves. If we are not pouring into ourselves, how can we effectively give to those around us? Everyone needs to know they matter, from our family to the closest of friends, and by loving the most important person first (ourselves), we can pour that back into the community. To see change, it must happen inward first to make a difference. That is how powerful self-love and intimacy are.
Let’s be clear, self-intimacy and self-love are not the only weapons in her arsenal.
Therapy has been a huge win for me as it continues to help me tap into the parts of me I locked away for so long. It was so difficult at first. I used to think that being pure was not being angry, frustrated, and feeling constant sorrow. I’ve been getting to know her, accepting her, crying with her, empowering her, encouraging her, and loving her. Some days I don’t feel like dealing with her, and when it gets too heavy, I call on the support of people I can trust and who would build me up to where I can.
Becoming the version of yourself you are in love with comes with big lessons. It’s learning never to run away from the parts of you that are the most painful and heaviest. Face yourself, embrace your darkest moments to heal, and give yourself the power to grow.
To heal your body, you have to heal your heart. Your feelings matter, and you deserve to speak up and say how you feel regardless of how someone takes it. These are some lessons that Irene has learned, but the most important is to know that you can evolve into your most beautiful self by going inward and loving yourself, which will show and resonate with everyone around you.
Our favorite boudoir-shooting, high-note-hitting mommy found a greater love for the simple things on this journey. Getting together to play Smash Brothers with her friends on the weekend, finding the perfect book to add to her collection, or discovering a new organic smell-good to obsess over are the small intimacies that she’s found joy in and embraces that. She loves being outdoors, sitting in stillness, and just breathing and listening to the wind. It helps to hear her deepest thoughts and think clearly. As she continues to evolve on her self-intimacy and self-love journey, we can expect bigger and better things.
For now, she has her sights on creating a larger fan base by sharing more of her original work, live performances and collaborations with other local artists and bands and expanding her social media. For her photography, it’s about bettering her craft through workshops, creating efficient workflows so she can regulate downtime, and bettering her branding. Irene also wants to inspire future photographers and hopes to develop courses that train her to prepare up-and-coming students. Until then, she hopes that everyone knows and understands that you are the greatest love of your life you will ever encounter, so learn to love yourself as only you can.
Irene Ali is a Wedding + Boudoir Photographer and Singer from St. Croix, USVI
ARTIST INFO
Social Media Handle: Facebook + Instagram @officialireneali
Email: irenealimusic@gmail.com
PHOTOGRAPHY
Social Media Handle: Facebook + Instagram @irenealiphotography
Website: www.irenealiphotography.com
Email: irenealiphotography@gmail.com
An Evolution in Intimacy with Irene Ali